The Reality of Winning
by talltwin18
Summary: Sequel to The Jar of Marmalade. The world has won the Final battle but has anyone really survived it? How far can the pain caused by Voldemort spread even when he has been destroyed? And what more deadly danger than ever before is waiting in the wings?
1. Chapter 1- Another step, and another

Prologue

So here is my attempt at a sequel to The Jar of Marmalade, been a hell of a long time getting around to it and as that really annoys me when other people do that in their stories I must apologise profusely and if you're reading this, thanks for sticking with me. For anyone new who hasn't read Jar of Marmalade, if you like go and check it, here is a few things you should know about the HP world I write in.

Sirius, Lily and James never died and Harry lives with the 3 of them and his 2 older brothers Andy and J at Potter Manor. I have read many stories where Harry has younger siblings but I love the relationship between Charlie and Bill and Ginny and wanted to try and recreate that for Harry.

Andy is 29 and works as an auror with James who is Head of the Auror Department. He is engaged to Kat (Katarina), a dark haired Hispanic liaison between the Ministry and foreign Ministry's in Spain, Portugal and France. J is 27 and works as a Healer like his long term partner Matt. J flew through Healer training with flying colours and is head of a diagnostic team and also has a muggle medicine degree.

Matt works in paediatrics. Harry and Ginny never broke up at the end of HBP but Dumbledore was still killed. Ron and Hermione professed their pent up feeling for each other soon after Harry and Ginny and are now a couple.

For the purposes of reducing confusion, in this story the Deathly hallows won't exist. Too much of a headache trying to keep tracking of who has them all! Horcruxes do exist and the Order knows about them. This story is set post final Hogwarts battle and the horcruxes, along with Voldemort, were all destroyed mainly by Harry but also the Order. A lot of people have written 'after the battle' stories and some people moan about the magnitude of those stories that there are but the truth is that we all just really like reading them as we all secretly want to keep the series going. So here is my take with some twists, some similarities that I've read and loved so much I had to use and some controversial ideas I hope you don't hate me too much for. ;)

I know this might be confusing and that I have changed a lot but isn't that the whole point of fan fiction, to write things how you would have liked them to happen so that is what I'm trying. I know it might not be what a lot of people like but I have tried to incorporate all the best bits of stories I have read and my own ideas as well.

As someone very expertly put; Harry Potter is J K Rowling's toys, we just play with them.

I hope you enjoy the following and try and be nice.

Thanks

Chapter 1

One foot in front of the other.

And again.

And again.

Such a simple thing, people barely think about it. But for Harry each step was like someone was twisting a dagger further and further into his heart, and yet he kept putting one foot in front of the other as he turned his back on the wonky gargoyle sentinel and Dumble... Harry visibly flinched at this slip... McGonagall's office.

It wasn't like Harry wasn't used to it after these past 17 years. In fact he had become adept at putting one foot in front of the other and moving on, filing away the guilt and pain and fear into boxes in the back of his mind and starting on the next job. But now there was no next job, no more missions. For Harry's sleep deprived and grief addled mind this was too much to comprehend and so he filed away the foreign feeling, that if he had looked closer he would have identified as being relief, and put one foot in front of the other.

Ron and Hermione kept pace by Harry's side. Not that this was a difficult feat as the pace he was setting was dictated and heavily restricted by exhaustion and injury, something that Ron and Hermione were beginning to feel with earnest as well. Hermione felt the despair and sadness pile on her as she watched her two boys dragging themselves down the corridor. Ron's left arm hung at an unnatural angle from his shoulder and he had a deep gash across his right knee. But it was his face that made something in Hermione ache. There were tracks through the grime on his face from the recently shed tears and his eyes held the dull look she had seen for too many years in Harry's eyes; one of grief and indescribable pain. Not a part of Harry's body seemed to be free of a cut or burn or bruise through his tattered clothing and his feet were barely moving across the rouble strewn stones now. As he turned around Hermione got her first look at his face and it was that look of emptiness staring back at her that finally broke her and she collapsed in a silent heap on the floor.

Both boys seemed to take this as their cue and instantly followed suit until all 3 were sitting on the dusty floor amidst the rubble backs against the wall, Hermione between Harry and Ron but gripping a hand each as tightly as her miniscule remaining energy allowed. She noticed out of the corner of her eye how Harry kept shaking his head every so often. None uttered a word. Simple words seemed so inappropriate amidst the destruction surrounding them, but none could find it in themselves to move from their spot on the floor, pain weighed them down too heavily.

In unity all 3 heads whipped around to look down the corridor they had just walked along as the unmistakable sound of footsteps echoed towards the trio. Hermione and Harry both bared their wands in the direction of the noise; Harry's trembling in his grip. But Ron forced his protesting muscles into standing up, leaning heavily against the stone wall, and providing what protection he could for Harry and Hermione. The sound of multiple footfalls got louder and louder and with curses on the tongues of the trio, several figures came into view; familiar figures.

'Stop! Don't fire!' Neville called. 'It's only us.'

He gestured at the group surrounding him which consisted of Bill, Charlie, Seamus, Dean and George who were all taken aback by how bad the Golden Trio looked. Hermione and Harry's prone but wavering wands were kidding no-one of how close they were to breaking down, Hermione, and slipping into unconsciousness, Harry. Ron's vague attempt at remaining standing in front of his two best friends brought tears to the eyes of his 3 older brothers, particularly Bill. He had only heard the bare minimal from Ron when he had arrived at Shell Cottage before Christmas but from that point something had significantly changed inside Ron. Bill didn't know but Ron had made a promise to himself that he would never again abandon Harry or Hermione and would stand between them and danger for as long as he was able. Bill's heart nearly broke at the words that came from Ron then.

'Please help us.'

Holding back a new wave of tears Neville took charge. 'Ok, guys let's get them to the common room, it's been properly searched and cleared by the aurors. Let's get them home.'

Seamus and Dean gently pulled Harry somewhat vertical and then set off to the place that had been their home for 7 years with an arm each of Harry's around their shoulders. They were followed by George carrying a silently weeping Hermione and Neville striding beside them wand poised.

Upon seeing his two best friends getting further away Ron dragged his screaming legs in front of the other, the pain wasn't important. He had made a promise and as long as he was still breathing he would be there protecting the two of them.

Charlie grimaced at his brother's obvious pain, 'Ron, we're here now. Please let us help you bro.' He attempted to grasp one of Ron's arms but the youngest Weasley kept pulling himself forwards occasionally using the wall for necessary support.

'I can't,' Ron whispered, his voice evidently laden with pain and guilt. 'I have to protect them, I... I've got to keep them safe.' He looked his oldest brother directly in the eye and Bill saw Ron's determination. He wanted a reason to stop, he needed a reason to stop and Bill was sure as hell going to give it to him.

'Come on Ron,' Bill said quietly to his baby brother as he and Charlie pulled one of Ron's arms over their shoulders. 'It's all ok now, they're safe.'

And it was those words and only those words that allowed Ron to sag into the grip of his 2 big brothers and be guided through the rubble strewn corridors of their second home whilst tears quietly tracked paths through the dirt and grime of everyone of the group's faces. Tears that dropped to the floor and washed away a tiny bit of dust.

Author's Note: So here we go again, hopefully. Thank you for anyone who's sticking with me and I hope you enjoy where the story goes from here.


	2. Chapter 2- Reality

Harry couldn't work out why it didn't hurt. It was the strangest feeling to him, something no-one else would ever be able to comprehend. There are some experiences that people say you can't understand until you live through that event; losing a loved one, be they friend or family, being completely helpless to save someone or knowingly delivering a fatal blow. For years Harry had struggled with letting people know him, the real him. Many had believed that it was because of the pain he had suffered through his childhood, and part of it was down to that. But contrary to common beliefs, Harry had always wanted to talk about his fears and pain; he never wanted to bottle it up, but long ago he had come to the conclusion that no-one could understand because no-one else had lived through Harry's pain and so no-one else ever needed to know. And it was only now after nearly two decades of almost constant pain, did Harry's unique scar exist as just that; a scar, merely a reminder of a past wound and not a present, perpetual pain. The feeling was unfathomable to Harry, his mind was so empty and calm it was as though he were floating through the air.

He lay perfectly still in his unchanged four poster dormitory bed in Gryffindor tower, staring in an unseeing haze at the dancing of sparkling dust in the shafts of early morning light pouring through the windows. It seemed right to Harry that the he should find himself here. That after everything that had happened, everything they had all gone through and everything they had lost, that the first thing he should be aware of was the soft comfort of fresh sheets and the warmth of the Gryffindor dormitories that had been the place where it all really began. He wished he could stay in this moment forever, cocooned away in silence and blankets, watching the shadows shrink and grow with the rising sun. Harry had often wished in small moments like this throughout his life, that if they could just last a bit longer and a bit longer and a bit longer then he could avoid the inevitable hardships and pain of the real world. But like every other time the guilt in Harry reared its head and his need to find those he loved and ensure he protected them won out.

The moment Harry broke his statue like position, pain shot from every muscle in his body. He forced his unwieldy muscles into action and stretched his limbs until he had managed to get himself sat on the edge of his bed. There wasn't a part of him that didn't ache or scream at him in objection as he attempted to stand on very shaking legs. Grasping onto one of the bed posts Harry dropped back onto sitting on his bed and took several deep breaths that although calmed his trembling muscles somewhat, drew immediate attention to a large gash in his chest, directly above his heart. The wound was around 2 and a half inches long and half an inch wide, with the ragged edges of skin a blackened colour. Closing his eyes Harry pushed the rising panic down and dealt with this new pain in his life like he did every other. He locked it away in a box in his mind whilst as gently as possible pulling down his dirty and holey t-shirt that had been pulled up to his chin at some point during his sleep. Once hidden from view and thought, Harry opened his eyes and surveyed the empty dormitory.

He wasn't sure what he was expecting to find as he looked at the familiar room. During those weeks of travelling hunting for horcruxes, endless hours of training and hiding from the incomprehensible mission Harry knew he had to complete, he spent many a day dream staring around this very room, every inch of it emblazoned in his mind; from the view of the sunrise over the lake if you got the angle just right looking out of the window, to the way you had to kick the bottom of the bathroom door to shut it properly or the array of socks, Quidditch paraphernalia and scraps of parchment that could always be found scattered across the floor. It brought Harry more comfort than he thought possible to see that little had changed and that of all the horrors waiting for him outside this room, here he could almost pretend nothing had changed. Yeah, nothing had changed. Nothing.

Harry closed his eyes taking a deep breath and rebuilt the wall inside his mind. Like everything else in his life, the final battle had also shattered his wall and rebuilding it was practically second nature to Harry now. Rebuilding it was easy, easier than facing up to the realities of the horror, grief and fear Harry had lived with his whole life.

'Harry.'

Harry's eyes shot open and he raised his wand, which had been tightly grasped in his hand ever since he had woken up, with the speed on one who could never be anything other than a seeker.

'Harry, wait! Calm down, it's us!' said a hoarse voice that Harry now identified as being Hermione.

Harry blinked several times, lowering his wand as the figures before him came into focus. Hermione stood at the foot of Harry's bed, the ever present lines of worry etched into her face but this time they were joined by several raw looking gashes. Ron stood next to her with one hand on her shoulder and the other wrapped tightly in white bandages up to his elbow. Although they both had clean faces and arms they still wore the same blood stained and ripped clothes from the battle. Harry looked down at himself and saw he was in a similar condition, as he stared at the tattered and torn jeans that had once been his favourite pair.

Hermione as always was one step ahead and answered Harry's unspoken question. 'We woke up like this,' she said indicating her clean skin. 'We reckon after we got brought up here they got Madam Pomfrey to fix us up, I don't really remember much after sitting down in the hallway.'

Hermione's voice tailed off as she stared into the space between the three of them. Ron tightened his grip around her shoulders as he looked at her with a mixture concern and understanding. There could be no denying that the war had forced many children to abandon their childhood in lieu of survival, but none had matured quite as much as Ron Weasley. Harry found himself glimpsing the true nature of Ron, now that he too had suffered the same tragedies and struggles as Harry, the pain of losing family. What he found staring back at him was no longer a boy, youngest brother lost in a family of huge personalities, but a man who cared, loved and had found something to fight for.

'There's some clothes in there if you want,' Ron said to Harry his voice cracking. He coughed, regaining his composure; he was going to look after them there was no doubt of that in Ron's mind. Never again would he let himself be that selfish little boy he had been in the not so distant past. 'Neither of us could do it,' he admitted to Harry his eyes dropping from Harry's to examine the blanket on his bed.

Harry knew the truth behind what Ron was saying, his suspicions confirmed when he saw that both Ron and Hermione also had their wands gripped tightly in their hands. A small part of Harry was pleased for a moment that it wasn't just him that knew things weren't over, however this was soon awashed by the guilt that he had done this to Ron and Hermione, he had turned them into soldiers. It was never meant to be this way, but after everything they had been through Harry couldn't help but feel such love for his two best friends who had never truly abandoned him.

'I know exactly what you mean,' Harry whispered, to looks of relief from Hermione and Ron. Harry forced himself onto his feet and within two steps had the two of them engulfed in a tight hug.

Ron and Hermione returned the hug with equal emotion and strength as though they were all trying to hold the other together. They stayed that way for a few moments, basking in the in pouring sunlight and silence, before Harry pulled back slightly.

'Thank you,' he whispered quietly to the two of them but with such conviction that they could both read the reams and reams of underlying and unsaid sentiment Harry conveyed. They all knew each other too well and had been through too much for some things to need to be actually voiced.

'You don't ever need to thank us Harry,' Hermione replied as Ron nodded in agreement with her words. 'We never have gone when you told us to and we never will. You're stuck with us I'm afraid.'

Her words brought a small smile to each of their faces even if it only lasted for a few moments before being engulfed in the realities of what they must do next.

'Come on then,' Harry said as he led the way to the door of the dormitory, the door out of their isolated world of peace and blissful ignorance. 'Let's get this over with; we can't hide in here forever.'

'You're right Harry,' Hermione replied taking Ron's hand and pulling him over to join Harry as he placed a hand on the door handle and forced himself to pull the door open with a loud creak that cut through the comfortable silence like a strike of lightening.

The three descended the spiral staircase to the welcoming familiarity of the Gryffindor common room. An empty Gryffindor common room. It was strange seeing this room, perfectly preserved as they remembered it. It was like walking through a museum as they stepped out of the untouched room and into the destruction and rubble of the outside corridor.

'I guess everyone's in the Great Hall,' deduced Hermione, looking at her watch. 'It's lunch time.'

The three shared a look, none of them could think of the possibility of eating anything right now, even Ron. After going for so many months on the bare minimum of whatever food they could scrounge, none of them had any real desire to eat when it wasn't absolutely necessary.

'Let's just do this,' Harry said and as a tight group they set off on the well worn path to the Great Hall.

As they passed by classrooms, windows, statues, staircases they began to glimpse the chaos and destruction that surrounded them. The wake of the battle had left its mark not only on the inhabitants of the castle but the walls of their sanctuary as well, making it impossible for them to try and avoid the reality of what had happened for the last 24 hours in this place that had been home to so many for so long.

They had to carefully pick their way down the final staircase to the Great Hall, dodging huge chucks of rubble strewn up the steps, until the trio found themselves stood in front of the huge open doorway standing shoulder to shoulder and staring back at the hundred or so pair of eyes that met them.

Harry looked out across the sea of people sat in groups at each of the four house tables. Their faces were a mixture of sadness, which tore another piece out of Harry, and something that took him a few moments to recognise. With shocking recognition Harry searched out the group of red and black heads of his family and took a physical step backwards as he saw the same look in each of them; joy. How could they possibly be anywhere close to happy, while surrounded by all this death, danger and fear. Harry felt Hermione tremble gently next to him and Ron's intake of breath as they both read the same emotions from the gathering crowd in the hall.

With a sense of horror Harry realised what was going to happen next and also that there was no way any of them could deal with that right now. As the first person began to clap, quickly being joined by more and more people, Harry whipped around grabbing a hand of both Ron and Hermione and fleeing out of the front doors of Hogwarts and into the grounds of the castle leaving nothing but the echo of a strangled sob in their wake.

**So I guess the first chapter didn't go down particularly well as I got zero reviews but here we go with take 2, hopefully you like chapter 2 a bit more. It would be lovely to get a review even if it's just a smiley face (or angry face as you dispair at my appalling writing) :) I'd love to hear what you think so please do let me know.**


	3. Chapter 3- Attempted Blissful Ignorance

**Chapter 3**

It should feel strange sitting here, Ginny thought to herself as she sat at the Gryffindor table in what was left of the Great Hall. But it wasn't the crumbled stone or disfigured statues Ginny was staring at. Neither did she stare around her at the huddled groups with tear and dirt streaked faces, nursing wounds or their own grief because that was too hard for her. For her entire life Ginny had forced herself into proving that she was stronger and tougher and braver than her brothers, no one else had. In fact on more than one occasion Mrs Weasley had tried to discourage that behaviour in her, always trying to proclaim the virtues of stereotypical activities for the female gender, but of course Ginny would have none of that. Just because she was female it didn't mean she couldn't be strong, that she couldn't fight or die for those she loved. For the man she loved.

It was through the broken window, behind the staff table, that Ginny's gaze laid. She looked out at the forest that was bathed in sunlight, the glimmer of the edge of the lake and endless blue skies unmarred by a single cloud. Staring out into that world Ginny could almost pretend it had never happened, that the last 5 years or so were all some elaborate dream. One of those dreams where so much happens and it seems to go on for so long that you wake up absolutely exhausted and then normally you forget the epic storylines that kept your mind so busy. But this time there would be no forgetting. She could stare out of the window for the rest of the life but she couldn't push back the memories forever. It was one thing she had always envied in Harry, his ability to file away an emotion, a disaster, a loss and just keep going. She might not be as good as him at hiding but she would damn well try, if anyone could give Harry Potter a run for his money in stubbornness it was Ginny. Harry, Ginny thought.

'Ginny?'

Bill's voice forced Ginny's gaze away from the calm world of blissful ignorance. She briefly met his eyes as he pushed a sandwich in front of her and gave her a look that was weirdly reminiscent of one of Mrs Weasleys specialities; it was the 'you had better eat that' look and Ginny had learned the hard way that it was never worth wasting her breath on that argument. So she tore off a corner of crust and began to mechanically chew, tasting nothing, as she gazed down at the rest of the inhabitants of the Gryffindor table. All of the Weasleys, except for Ron, were sat along her side of the table with Bill immediately next to her, his free arm that wasn't feeding himself soup was wrapped around the shoulders of an even more pale than normal Fleur. Even Fred and George were in keeping with the quiet mourning that had settled over the hall as they quietly talked with their parents. Occasionally they would share a small joke with Sirius who sat opposite them next to Remus and Tonks, but none of them responded with more than a brief smile. However each smile seemed to lift a bit more grief from everyone's shoulders that sat at the table. Everyone's except Ginny, who seemed, like her own emotions, to be immune to the atmosphere around her. Harry's family sat opposite her with both James and Andy having an arm around their wives, and J and Matt sat hand in hand looking a few minutes from sleep as this was their first break from the medical wing for the past 13 hours or so. Ginny knew she should be grateful that in the midst of all the horrors they had experienced, they were all still here, no one had been lost. But nothing. Nothing seemed to be able to register with her, so she tore of another corner of tasteless bread and began to chew as her eyes swivelled back to the broken window.

Bill watched his baby sister with disbelief at the years and years of pain he had seen staring back at him from her eyes. She had grown up without any of them realising, well she had been forced to. The rest of the family had had a rough time, that could never be in question, but they had all been adults really, even Ron. But Ginny had been forced out of her childhood and not just in the last year but in reality, it had been so since her second year. Nobody could come away from an experience like the Chamber of Secrets without it impacting the person you are at the end of it. She kept staring out at the window like it held something for her, some answer that would make everything make sense, make everything alright. It was only when he looked down at his arm that was holding onto his loving wife that it finally clicked with him. Looking at the rest of the family around the table they were all sat with the people or person they loved most in the world, the people that they had fought for and gone through this hell for. But Ginny's reason for going on wasn't here. She didn't have that comfortable weight around her shoulders, smell that familiar smell and know that no matter what happened you could now be happy because they were there. It was strange after around 2 years of barely seeing Ginny and Harry separated for Ginny to be sat alone. His usually effervescent and stubborn sister had never looked smaller and weaker in her whole life, but the one upside was that she wasn't crying. Bill could count on one hand the number of times Ginny had cried in her life and he knew it only meant one thing; that she had given up and was drowning in her pain.

Bill's attention was pulled from worrying over Ginny to the doors of the Great Hall as Fleur tugged on his shoulder, pointing in that direction. Immediately the three bedraggled figures came into focus and without consciously thinking it the smiles erupted on all of the families faces as the trio that had been unseen for the best part of a year stood before them. Who knew who it was that started it, in the future Bill would vaguely recall it being a little boy that grasped a camera with a strap far too big for him, but applause began to ring through the now silent hall and pretty soon the infectious clapping had everyone up on their feet cheering.

It was a strange choking sound that brought everyone to a stop as rather than entering the Great Hall and taking up seats with their family and friends, the trio ran from the doorway and disappeared from view.

Bill glanced around and saw Ginny, still sat at the table, drop her eyes to the table and the sandwich in front of her before pulling off another piece of bread, and pulling it to tiny pieces with her slightly trembling fingers.

'We should go and find them,' Andy said pulling himself to his feet and looking meaningfully at Bill.

'I agree, come on lets go,' Bill replied. But before he could pull one foot over the bench he was pulled back into his seat by Fleur just as Kat did the same to Andy.

'Zey need time, Bill,' Fleur explained quietly, soothingly stroking his arm before grasping hold of his hand.

'If they wanted to be in here they would be,' said Sirius in a voice laidened with sadness and just a tinge of bitterness, but a tinge that was not missed by the rest of the family members, some of who nodded along in understanding agreement.

'You cannot think that,' said Remus in a voice louder than anyone had spoken yet drawing all their attentions. 'They didn't come in because they didn't want, it was because they couldn't.'

'What do you mean Remus? 'Course they could have if they'd wanted to,' Bill asked confusedly. It made no sense; it wasn't as though any of the three of them had looked particularly injured or incapacitated.

Remus put down the spoon he had been using on his own bowl of soup and took a deep breath before looking around and making sure he had the attention of the whole family before he explained his theory. 'Look, I've seen war many a time. I know, I know we've all been through the pain of this battle and most of us the horrors of the first battle too but I've seen the war in between then. I've seen the training of wizards; pushing them to their breaking point and then building them up stronger again and again. I've seen the men and women and children after they've lost people or lost themselves and some of them I've tried to and hopefully have helped over the years.'

'Remy, what's your point? We've all been through hell, we know,' said Sirius with a hint of annoyance.

Remus took another breath and looked directly at Sirius. 'Where's your wand Sirius?'

Sirius gave him a look of confusion mixed with exasperation, shared by many of the table's inhabitants, before responding, 'Well it's in my holder on my arm where I put it when I got changed early, obviously. It's not gonna have moved Remy, seriously are you alright? You aren't making much sense.'

Remus rolled his eyes. 'All 3 of them had their wands in their hands. None of them had put them away, not in a pocket or holder, but out and primed ready.'

'When we found them in that corridor their wands were about the only part of them they could all hold up,' Charlie said quietly.

'And Neville told me that when he was on protection duty, none of them let go of their wands, even when they were asleep,' George added, without a trace of humour.

'You see,' Remus continued. 'Although everyone in the Order played a part in destroying those damned horcruxes, all we really did was feed them the information needed and asked of us. None of us questioned it at the time because it was working, they were working. None of us thought about what we had expected of three teenagers and what we were subjecting them to with those expectations. They always had the next plan organised and usually half way completed before any of us realised how much danger they were putting themselves in.'

'You're right Remy,' said James who had been silent up 'til now. He was trying so hard to embrace the joy of having won and having his wife and sons and daughter by his side, but he knew that would be impossible until his whole family were reunited. 'For the past year they have been constantly prepared for attacks, always on defence of their lives. We all had safe houses to run to and let's face it, to hide in.'

At these words a wave of shame crashed over the table, as each of them came to terms with the selfishness of their views on the trio's disappearance.

'I dread to think of what they have been through that we don't know about, because let's face it they never really told us much because we didn't ask. I think I was too afraid to know,' Lily said, staring resolutely at her two sons as a tear worked its way down her cheek.

'I don't think know how to deal with it all being over,' Remus concluded, tightening his hold on Tonks.

'I think they just can't believe its over,' J said, raising his head from where it had been resting on Matt's shoulder. 'They won't let themselves believe it just in case it's not true and something else happens that cuts away yet another piece of them.'

A new degree of horror and sadness settled over the group at these words and silence engulfed them all. Bill felt a combination of grief, anger and pity for the three youngest in their family that had suffered so much. But it was more than before. Before it had all been Voldemort's fault, he had inflicted all of this devastation on them all, but now after J's words he realised they had all had a hand in it. Maybe not directly but they had all stood back and watched because deep down none of them were brave enough to take their place.

It was with almost a smile that Bill realised his slip of the mind in calling the three of them the youngest in the family. He turned automatically to Ginny to tell her about his 'senior moment' as she often liked to call these moments, expecting a glare or roll of the eyes and possibly a smack around the back of the head. But the words fell silent on his tongue as he saw in dread her gaze had returned to the smashed window and a tear drop fall from her chin onto the table.

**Thank you so much for the lovely reviews some people left, it's really nice to know someone is enjoying what I write and gives me a push to keep writing. So if you want to hear more, send me a quick review even if it's just a happy or sad face (though hopefully happy). I apologise if there are any errors but I wanted to get this out as soon as possible and was losing patience with it so decided for now it can go up as is, but it may be edited in the future as there are some bits I'm not entirely happy with. :)**


	4. Chapter 4- Luring frightened animals

If there's anyone out there who still has interest in this story, I apologise to you. I hate to be one of those authors who leave a story hanging, but i've been kind of lost in life recently and couldn't find the next place to take this story. So my apologies but if you are still there, thank you for not giving up on me and hope you like it.

Chapter 4

Harry ran blindly, only the grip of two best friends' hands grounding him to reality, eventually collapsing onto the damp but warm ground. Breathing deeply against his protesting lungs he gazed around at his surroundings. They were sat on the edge of the hill of the Hogwarts grounds looking out at the valley and lake ahead of them. It was such a beautiful day with the sun sparkling off the deep blue water and cloudless sky not impeding the endless view as the winter mist often did from this view point. Harry looked down and noticed in surprise that Hagrid's hut was still standing in all its wonky and decrepit glory. There were even still birds pecking at the oversized orange and yellow pumpkins to the side of the hut, completely oblivious to the scarecrow glowering at them. Some things would never change.

It was this thought that caused Harry to inhale suddenly in realisation of his thoughts. Nothing was the same, not really. Sure the birds still pecked away at the rotting vegetables but Hagrid wouldn't come bursting out of his front door waving a broom to scare them off, most likely all while still wearing his flowering apron. No, that had changed along with everything else what with Hagrid in the Hospital Wing having his broken leg treated. Too much had changed and Harry realised it was that change, that feeling of being completely lost in the world that scared him the most.

'I really missed this place,' Ron said absentmindedly, as though he were talking to himself.

This brought a grin to the edges of Hermione's mouth as she turned and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. 'Never thought I'd hear the like; Ron Weasley missed school.'

Ron let out a small chuckle in response, 'Yeah well don't get used to it, I doubt it will last long.'

The atmosphere went quiet again as the three teenagers watch the shadow of a cloud trace along the hill in front of them before disappearing from view.

Hermione took a deep breath and was the first to break the once comfortable but now eerie silence that surrounded them. 'You know I get it Harry,' she said looking at the bent head of her best friend. He sat a small ways ahead of them, his face hidden from view and his wand still grasped tightly in his hand, like both Ron and Hermione's wands.

'You get what Hermione?' Harry replied in a monotone voice.

'I get why you pulled us away, back in at The Great Hall, and I'm glad and thankful you did. You were right that it would have been touch much for any of us to accept that kind of gratitude right then.' She paused, looking for the right words. Ron placed his free hand in hers and nodded sombrely encouraging her to continue with what they both new needed to be said. 'But Harry, they're our family. And our friends. And they deserve to see us and know we're okay and celebrate their freedom. They need to.'

'Hermione's right Harry and you know it, come on whenever is she not?' Ron added.

'And we need to see they're all okay. We all made it Harry. By some miracle we all made it and we have earned the right to be happy about that, we have damn it!' Hermione continued frustration entering her voice unwittingly.

'No,' Harry whispered.

'No what Harry?' Ron encouraged gently.

'No that is not what we get now,' Harry whispered back, a cold bitterness twisting his voice into something unrecognisable as Harry. 'We have not bloody earned that!'

Ron and Hermione shared wary looks. 'Harry that's not what we meant,' Hermione attempted to explain. 'It's just tha...'

'No!' Harry said louder this time. He was trembling now and pulled his arms around himself to try to suppress the involuntary show of weakness. 'Just go.'

'Harry no mate, we're not gonna leave you,' Ron replied earnestly not want to break his unspoken promise to Harry or Hermione.

'Just get away from me!' Harry shouted at them, whipping his head round as though he were hurling the words at them. His wide, bloodshot eyes a shocking contrast to the deathly white sunken features of his face.

Feeling at a complete loss for how to help their best friend, Ron and Hermione hesitantly rose to their feet and backed away from the prone, trembling figure of a broken Harry Potter as though in a daze. Once again their feet continued to move without conscious thought, one foot in front of the other. Like so many days of the past year, spent walking hour after hour. The worst days had been when they had no destination planned, no target, no aim, just walking in a desultory fashion because if they stopped they would just have to admit how lost they were in this world of war and quests and pain.

It was with a shock of guilt and comfort that the pair realised they had found their way to The Great Hall. They had found their way to their families after all this time. To help.

In the Great Hall

'They're back,' Sirius whispered to the family surrounding the food laden table.

Heads whipped up, hoping to see the three familiar figures that had been missing from their table for so long. However expressions of hope and the beginnings of joy were marred by confusion and sadness as they recognised only two dishevelled figures gripping wands and each other's hands tightly, the imposing grand arch of The Great Hall doorway making the figures seem to shrink towards each other even more.

Mrs Weasley let out an unintelligible cry and rose to her feet ready to welcome her baby boy home. She was surprised when a strong, familiar hand grasped her wrist, gently pulling her back down into her seat. She looked up with confusion into the eyes of her husband.

'We're going to have to give them time,' he said gently, removing his hand from her wrist to enclose her hand tightly. 'Let them make their own way home.'

Bill nodded along with his father. 'Dad's right Mum, they need to come to terms with not being alone anymore on their own.'

'Ironically,' the twins muttered in unison with a hint of a smile much to the eye rolls of their surrounding families. Though their grins grew fractionally at the wink of approval Sirius sent their way.

The subdued and stilted conversations that had been exchanged across the table came to a resounding halt leaving the air thick with silence broken only by the sound of distant conversation from the other three tables and two sets of hesitant and painfully slow footsteps that had become the focus of all Weasleys, Potters and honorary family members alike.

Sirius grabbed his sandwich and taking a bite chewed with studious concentration, tasting nothing but trying to act as natural as possible. This was so surreal he thought to himself taking another bite. They were acting as though these teenagers were frightened animals they were trying to lure back into their cages.

'That's exactly what they are,' James whispered shocking Sirius into realising he had unwittingly voiced his thoughts out loud. James gave a small smile, a mixture of relief and sadness. 'They are frightened and lost and we have to let them come back on their own terms.'

'Or they might bolt,' Lily finished for him. She had one hand tightly grasped in James' and the other holding onto J's shoulder. Her gaze kept flicking between J and Andy every few minutes as though assuring herself they were still there.

Time seemed to slow as the pair of footsteps got closer and closer until they stopped at the edge of their familial group. Without thought all heads turned to smile unashamedly at the two exhausted and scarred faces of Ron and Hermione. Ron stared at his brothers and parents his eyes wide but his lips unmoving and his brow furrowed, in pain or confusion they could not tell.

'We...' Hermione began in a hoarse voice before stopping herself and automatically stepping closer to Ron if that was even possible. She coughed quietly and tried again with a deep breath. 'We... need your help.'

Smiles began to grow on the faces of the parents and adults of the group as they inwardly sighed in relief at the admission of accepting others' help.

'Please,' choked out Ron, not knowing what else to say to the people who had known if his whole life. 'It's Harry.'

It was at these two words that Ginny immediately stood up. She looked at her brother and best friend and though she knew that she would never share the exact same bond as the trio of hero's, at that moment a new sense of respect and love passed between the three that could never have been transformed into spoken words. But it was there and deep down it healed a small part of each of them, though the pain of the present was too imposing for it to be felt in that moment.

'He's outside,' Ron said quietly looking directly at Ginny, his words only really for her. For he recognised now, as Ginny raced past them with a grateful yet worried look across her face, that the grounding and comfort he got from just having Hermione at his side was exactly what was between Harry and Ginny. And exactly what Harry needed. He hoped fervently as he and Hermione lead the rest of their family out to their final lost family member.

Note: Thanks for reading, always greatly appreciate any reviews. Please remember this is only my interpretation as I appreciate not everyone will agree with me but please be nice :) Thanks again


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